


Secrets

by Lire_Casander



Category: Hanson
Genre: M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-09-05
Updated: 2013-09-05
Packaged: 2017-12-25 17:00:54
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,798
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/955556
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lire_Casander/pseuds/Lire_Casander





	Secrets

The ocean was calm in front of him. The houses at his back straightened up in the darkness like old guards watching the coast. The sun hadn't risen; it was playing hide and seek with the clouds even though it was almost seven in the morning.  


 

He dried a tear bold enough to escape from his eyes through his closed eyelashes. He was furious with himself for being so weak, and sad for how things had turned out. He had thought this time would have been the definitive, but he had only gotten a new wound in his heart.  


 

He should have learned years before he wouldn't escape heartache so easily. David wasn't different from every guy he had shared a moment of his life with, he was the same kind of boy who only looked for his fame and money. Sometimes he wished not to be Zac Hanson, but just Zac, the 20-year-old guy who was searching for his place in the world.  


 

The problem was, he hadn't found it, and he was beginning to be hopeless.  


 

"Zac, are you ok? I saw you leave the hotel and I'm worried," a well-known voice said at his back.  


 

He fidgeted on the sand, uncomfortably, but he didn't answer. Another tear threatened to roll down his cheek, and he didn't want anybody to see him crying. Not even his older brother. Especially his older brother.  


 

"Zac, please, talk to me. Or don't speak at all, but look at me. I hate it when you don't want to look at me when you're sad."  


 

"Taylor, please, leave me alone."  


 

"Is this about David? What has he done to you?"  


 

Zac tried to shake his head no, but it didn't come out right. He had fought against tears when answering his brother, but now he was on the verge of collapsing and he wasn't able to take control of his own movements. 

 

Before he collapsed on the ground, Taylor's arms held him. He was surrounded by the warm hug of his older brother, comforted by his calm breathing while he cried.  


 

When he was calmed enough to stay still, he look at his brother in the eye with a sad, watery smile. 

 

"You don't have to tell me if you don't want to," Taylor said. "But I want you to know that I'm here for anything you need. Anything."  


 

  
_What if I asked you to stay by my side for always? I know you would never hurt me_ , Zac thought.  


 

"Could you please stay for a while?" he whispered. "I know that before... but now..."  


 

"Of course."  


 

Taylor sat next to Zac, wrapping himself around his knees and letting his chin rest on them. Zac imitated him, and both watched the horizon for so long time that they lost track of the minutes. The sun rose definitively and bathed them with its light.  


 

"When we came back last night from the concert," Zac began, "I went straight to the room, 'cause I hadn't seen David backstage, so I thought he'd come back to the hotel sooner than expected. He had been complaining about a headache yesterday."  


 

Taylor observed him in silence, expressionless, encouraging Zac to astonish him with his words.  


 

"He was nowhere to be seen. I even went out to the steps, but he wasn't there. I tried to phone him and he didn't answer. I came back to the lobby and asked for him; one of the fans who were there said they had seen him in the swimming pool. It's the problem of them knowing who's your partner, they also stalk him. The thing is, I went to the pool, and..." he trailed off and resumed watching his hands, unable to continue.  


 

Taylor tucked a tuft of Zac's fringe off his face and caressed his cheek where the tears were slipping again. He waited for Zac to calm down a little before speaking.  


 

"Zac, whatever it was, you know you didn't deserve it, okay? Do you know?" he insisted.  


 

  
_I did deserve it. I can't be with anybody if I'm thinking about you... You are my whole life_ , Zac thought. Only when he nodded smoothly, Taylor let go of him.  


 

"He was in the swimming pool. With Fred. His ex-boyfriend."  


 

Taylor watched him, mouth hanging open, he couldn't believe what he was hearing. It was the third time that something like that happened to Zac. Ever since he had announced he was gay – causing a great stir at home, his boyfriends had been using him for their own aims, taking as much money as they could before running away. Taylor remembered how excited Zac was when he started dating David six months before, and his smile when announcing, two weeks before, that he was going to live with David as soon as the tour finished.  


 

Taylor was watching each one of his brother's dreams break in front of him. He was going to kill David with his bare hands.  


 

"They were..." Zac stuttered when he was nervous. "They were naked in the water, kis... kissing. I tripped and mad... made some noise and they turned to me. They laughed at me and... and... David said he had the st... stupidest man in front of him. He tha... thanked me for the flat and the car and continued kissing Fred. I left running then... and came here."  


 

"He thanked you for the flat and the car? The ones you paid for? The flat you were going to live together in?" 

 

"Yes."  


 

Taylor hugged his brother without saying anything else. He knew Zac had spent the night at the beach watching the stars, that he was very tired, and that he didn't have any strength left to come back to the hotel. He helped him to stand up and pulled his shirt down.  


 

"Right now we're going back, you're going to go to sleep and I will solve everything else, do you understand me? C'mon."  


 

He held him all the way back, and he tucked him in when when Zac lay down. He fell asleep immediately, and Taylor observed him while his chest raised and lowered rhythmically. _If only I could fix each piece of your heart, if you let me... I would never hurt you_ , he thought. Then he left the room without making any noise, crossed the corridor and knocked on Zac's door. Surely David wouldn't have the nerve to have returned to the hotel, though he'd better check that.  


 

The door opened, and Taylor saw red.  


 

David was standing in front of him, sheet coiled around his waist and messy hair. Behind him, a piece of the bed could be seen, and a pair of legs stretched sluggishly.  


 

"You!" Taylor exclaimed, infuriated. "You! How could you, you fucking ungrateful bastard? And you have come back and done only God knows what with _him_ in Zac's bed! I'm going to kill you!"  


 

He flew at David, but the other was stronger and stopped him with a single hand. David cocked an eyebrow.  


 

"What are you doing here, Taylor? Shouldn't you be sleeping? You had a concert tonight, at Panama City."  


 

"How dare you?" Taylor wanted to beat him for having the cheek to give him advice. "Why are you here?! You've broken his heart!"  


 

"I suppose you're talking about Zac," David pursed his lips. "But perhaps we shouldn't talk about it in here. You're making a scene."  


 

Taylor looked to his left and his right, and saw the heads of some hotel clients out different doors. He clenched his fists, too mad to lower his voice.  


 

"I don't care!! You didn't have any right! No right to do this to him!" Taylor raised a hand, trying to slap David.  


 

"Are you going to beat me? I'm so scared," David mocked him. "Perhaps you would have to go back to your room and tell your brother how that sick heart of yours feels instead of threatening me."  


 

"I don't know what you're talking about."  


 

"Oh, of course you know," there was a sardonic smile on David's lips. "Or do you think I don't know why you look so much at him, with those puppy eyes? Don't point out my mistakes, Taylor, don't be a hypocrite."  


 

Taylor shook. He hadn't realized till then that David had noticed how he watched Zac. It was his secret, a secret that needed to be kept under seven locks because, had it become public, it would destroy everything they'd fought for. What he felt for his brother was driving him crazy, and he couldn't let David take that advantage.  


 

"Go away," he said lowering his voice and hardening his tone. "Leave him alone, David."  


 

"And you will be able to gather the pieces of his heart?" the question was dangerous, and Taylor felt how it nailed in his soul. "You're such a romantic."  


 

"Leave him alone, David."  


 

He turned his back on him and returned to his room, without paying attention to the astonished expressions from his neighbors. He closed the door and punched the doorframe.  


 

Zac was still asleep, exhausted, on the bed, in the same position in which Taylor had left him a while ago. He was so calm, wrapped around a pillow and with a smile on his lips. Taylor knew he was dreaming something pretty.  


 

He remained at his side, watching him without really seeing him, hands shaking, a bundle of nerves. So close that he could touch Zac without him finding out, he could kiss him. He leaned over Zac and brushed his lips. What if Zac woke up? Smoothly, he placed a kiss on his brother's lips, fighting against the desire to remain on them forever.  


 

His mind took over him and he moved away from his brother all of a sudden, scared of what he'd just done. He walked away from the bed, backwards, and sheltered in the bathroom. Taking hold of the basin, he shook his head refusing to watch his reflection in the mirror. He was scared of seeing the face of a sick man.  


 

A cough at his back frightened him. He didn't want to turn his back, but a voice forced him.  


 

"Taylor, why didn't you tell me sooner...?"  


 

Zac was in the doorway, blushing but smiling. In his glance, uncertainty, fear and love could be read. A lot of love.  


 

"I know this is not the best moment, but since you... well..." Zac fought to find the words. "Perhaps if you give me some time... maybe I..."  


 

"What do you want me to do, Zac?" Taylor asked stupidly.  


 

Zac seemed to recover his speech.  


 

"Just kiss me again, fool."  


 

And so many emotions, and so many frustrations, and so many hidden feelings for such a long time vanished in an eternal kiss.

 


End file.
